The Vs. Studio Blog

I’m backstage, about to go on as “Austin”, mid-run of a dream production of TRUE WEST. I have a moment. Everything slows down. I look around and take everything in. I see my fellow actors prepping. I hear the hustle and bustle of the audience. I feel the energy pulsing all around me.

I’m overcome with gratitude and emotion. Tears well up. Then a realization. A constant thought washes over me. Call it a mantra. “It’s a miracle.”

“It’s a miracle.”

“It’s a miracle.”

“It’s a miracle.”

It’s a miracle that Sam Shepard’s estate said yes. They gave us the rights to produce his masterpiece.

It’s a miracle I get to do this amazing part in this iconic play.

It’s a miracle I get to act alongside this incredibly talented, dedicated and generous cast. Including my artistic brother, Andy Hawkes (pictured above as “Lee”), who helped me produce this play. He always had my back and was there at every turn.

It’s a miracle we convinced our friend and badass director, Scott Cummins, to drive down over six hours every week, leaving his family behind, to rehearse and put up this play. For pure love of the art.

It’s a miracle we have this supremely talented design team, our Vs. family, that make us look so good in our costumes, under beautiful lights, on a ridiculously creative set with a terrifying fight scene that brings it all home.

It’s a miracle we have such a devoted stage crew, house manager and box office manager. They’re also Vs. family. They keep everyone happy and everything running on point.

It’s a miracle all the people who gave their time and talents to this production. They supported us in so many ways.

And it’s a miracle that 35 people (our max capacity) showed up tonight to watch us perform. They purchased a ticket. They took time out of their busy lives, in some cases arranging for a sitter, drove here, parked, and arrived on time. With open hearts and minds, ready to receive this beautiful story, rooting us on at every moment.

It’s a miracle. It’s all a miracle.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

“Places everyone.”

I snap to attention.

Showtime…

That was about a year ago.

I pray every day and can’t wait for the miracle of live theatre to return.

Information is a commodity. It didn’t use to be the case. But thanks to the internet, it is now.

What’s not a commodity and never will be?

The application of that information.

Synthesis.

Understanding and communicating the information.

Deciding to take action. Even if you don’t have all the information. Even if things might not work. Doing it anyway. Because you care that much. (The definition of art.)

Leadership. Standing by your decision. Inspiring others.

Resiliency.

Flexibility. Especially when new information is presented to you.

Empathy.

Generosity.

Integrity.

Let us embrace and practice these traits. For they will never go out of style. They will never be a commodity.

What art would you make if you based your choice entirely on process, on having a meaningful experience, as opposed to the end result and judgment of others?

You’ll never regret going after something with everything you have and falling short. You can live with that.

You’ll only regret giving a half-assed effort.

Or not going after something at all.

For anything that happens to us, anything we read or hear, anyone who evokes strong emotions in us, we’d be wise to do two things before responding.

First, bring awareness. Just be aware that we’re having that response. Notice the thoughts. Don’t judge them.

Second, bring curiosity. Get intensely curious with our feelings. Be our own emotional detectives. Say to ourselves as often as we need to…”That’s interesting.” As if we’re playing a part and trying to get into the skin of the character. Why are we feeling this way? What might be causing it? Is there something deeper going on?

“That’s interesting” is a great pattern interrupt. It stops us from going down the same, worn out, response grooves. It’s also the first step towards making any kind of lasting change.

I’ve had the pleasure of knowing and working with some incredible actors. Actors with long, illustrious stage, film and television careers. They’ve all consistently shared this principle with me: “An actor’s really lucky if he or she gets a few great roles in their lifetime. The rest is work. Show up and do your job the best you can.”

Think about that…A few great roles. In a lifetime. If you’re lucky.

Can you counter this? Is there a way to not let fate determine your chance at artistic happiness?

Yes! By taking responsibility. By finding or creating a great piece of material for yourself. A role you’re dying to play. A story you simply must share. So much so that you’re willing to do all the difficult work of producing. And producing with excellence and generosity. For yourself. Your fellow artists. And the audience you seek to serve.

Rinse. Repeat.

Over a lifetime, you’ll have an incredible body of work. Roles you’d never have been cast in. Deeply meaningful experiences and lasting friendships.

That’s the mission of The Vs. Studio and this blog.

Don’t wait to get picked. Pick yourself.

Or as Bruce Lee said, “To hell with circumstance. I create opportunities.”

Go make your art.

Be so demanding of yourself and exacting in your work.

That other people’s criticisms feel like a walk in the park.

“Success is peace of mind that is the direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.” -John Wooden

For life and for anything we’re trying to do, it’s vital to know how we define success. It should be our own, personal definition.

It might take us a while to craft. And we might change and refine it over our lifetime. But we should have one and know it cold. Because it’s our anchor. Our North Star. Our constant way to measure if we’re living up to our own standards and highest ideals. Not subject to the whims of others or the prevailing culture.

The observer effect is a common principle in quantum mechanics. Basically, it states that the mere observance of an object changes the actual object. You can read more about it, including Schrodinger’s famous cat, HERE.

The Stoics advocate behaving as if someone is always watching you. Someone you admire and respect. Seneca called it having a “sage on your shoulder” at all times.

So, if you knew you were being observed and that the observance changed you, what would you do differently? What actions would you take or not take? What habits? What art might you create?

Let the observer effect inform what we think, say and do.

“I criticize by creation, not by finding fault.” -Marcus Tullius Cicero

It’s easy to know what we’re against. There’s a long list. And it’s the first step towards progress. But it can’t end there.

We must know what we’re actually for. What specific changes do we want to make? What new systems do we want to build? What art do we want to create?

The Franciscan Friar and great spiritual teacher Richard Rohr writes…we go from Order to Disorder to Reorder.

That’s where the work is. That’s the full journey we must go on.