The Vs. Studio Blog

First level: As artists, we must tell the truth.

Next level: Tell the truth in an interesting way.

Marshall McLuhan famously declared the medium is the message.

Expanding on this concept…As artists we need to fully understand the medium we’re operating in and what’s required by it. Specifically, we need to know how much or how little collaboration is necessary to make our art.

Painting and novel writing for example, are more solitary pursuits. Theatre and film on the other hand, are extremely collaborative mediums. To manifest your passion in those mediums, you’ll need to enlist and inspire a whole bunch of other talented people to come along for the ride. You’ll need to constantly communicate and create a meaningful experience for them. And always operate with generosity. Otherwise, the vision in your head won’t get realized or it falls flat.

You’re only as good as your collaborators. Every one of them is as vital to the project as you are. Treat them that way.

No, I don’t mean it this way.

I mean, taking a break before you decide. Before you respond. Before you comment or post or tweet.

My wife tells how as a teenager, she’d go shopping with her mom. Inevitably, she’d want something and ask her mom to buy it. Her mom would wisely counter with (I’m paraphrasing): “We’re not buying this today. But…if it’s something you really love, I mean really love–can’t live without– and you still feel that way in a week or so…then we can discuss it.”

Nine point five times out of ten, my wife would forget about the item or decide she didn’t want it after all.

The Stoic teacher Epictetus wrote, “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.”

The first way to control our response to all outside stimuli and events is with time. Take a beat. Think about the effects of our potential actions. Say to ourselves, “Is this something we really, really want to say or do right now?”

Sit on it for a little while.

Then, with clear eyes and hearts, we can decide what to do. How to respond.

Negativity bias basically states that we remember bad things much more than good things. Evolutionary psychologists believe we’re hard wired this way so as to avoid being eaten by Saber-tooth Tigers. (The media unfortunately weaponizes this trait to grab our attention. “If it bleeds, it leads.”)

You know what else we remember?

Compliments. Especially unexpected compliments. They stick with us. I suspect that just like we remember bad news or outcomes, we remember compliments because they are rare events. Outliers. They come out of nowhere and blindside us.

And when we receive them, they can make all the difference between continuing on our chosen path, our passion project, our art, or quitting it.

So. Knowing its power, who can you give an unexpected compliment to?

Go do it. It will mean the world to them.

It’s the simplest concept, but one we always forget or neglect to do:

“If you want something, then you have to ask for it.“

Let’s break the above “If/Then” statement down into two parts.

First, what do you WANT? What do you truly want? So much so, that you’re willing to do the second part wish is to…

ASK for what you want. If it’s worth it, if it’s what you truly want, then you should be willing to ask for it. Regardless of the outcome. Right?

And what exactly is the worst possible outcome, again? The worst thing that can happen?

Oh, yeah. You’ll be rejected. Someone will say No. You might feel bad.

Uh…okay.

So?

Now you have a decision to make. A choice.

One. Keep asking. Either the same person or others. Or both.

Two. Stop asking. Realize that you didn’t really want the thing bad enough in the first place. Otherwise, you’d keep asking, keep working on it until you turned the “No” into a “Yes.” But at least you have closure. You can go find something else that’s worth asking for.

But you gotta ask.

YOU gotta ask.

Stop waiting to be asked.

Need some more inspiration? Watch this TED Talk.

Instead of looking at all our daily tasks as things we “have” to do or “must” do or “need” to do, what happens if we look at them as things we “get” to do? To have enormous gratitude in our heart that we’re alive and we have the extreme privilege of getting to do things. Especially helping others.

It’s a subtle shift semantically–one word–but monumental for our outlook and our approach to daily living.

The writer and professor Arthur Brooks wrote a recent article “The Clocklike Regularity of Major Life Changes” about transitions. He cites plenty of research as well as anecdotal evidence to substantiate his article. He also has a great podcast episode about it.

Transitions are predictable and inevitable. On average, we can expect to encounter one every 12 to 18 months. Over a lifetime, we’ll probably experience three to five major, “life quake” transitions. Some good, some painful, but all lead to growth. Society as a whole, regularly faces life quake transitions. In the last two decades alone, we’ve had three: 9/11, The Great Recession, and now Covid.

Here’s the good news…

While transitions are difficult and painful to endure in the moment, when we look back on them, we almost always judge them to be a success. Moreover, because of “fading affect bias”, we remember them fondly. They can lead to deeper meaning and purpose. [This reminded me of the book “Tribe” by Sebastian Hunger in which he argues that painful events such as war (he by no means is an advocate) are ironically, often remembered more positively by the participants and affected individuals than “happier” times and events.] Brooks goes on to say that transitions also bring heightened creativity and energy.

Whatever we’re facing today, whatever lies ahead, regardless of why or how it happened, we’d be wise to lean into the uncertainty. Embrace transitions. Not resist them.

Perhaps knowing that growth, deeper meaning and purpose lay on the other side, will make it a little easier to leap into the abyss.

Among other things, Covid-19 has taught us not to take a single day for granted. I mean we always knew that as an idea, a sound principle, but I think now we’re actually feeling it in our bones. Remembering Memento Mori is such a valuable and worthwhile practice.

If we truly feel that each day is a gift, something to be cherished and grateful for, then let us earn the gift. With our thoughts and actions. Earn the right to get up every morning. Earn the right to work hard. Earn the right to make things better for others. Earn the right to make our art. Earn the right to enjoy our families and friends. Earn the right to relax and have fun. Earn the right to appreciate the world in all its beauty and fragility.

Earn the right to have another day.

James Clear wrote this excellent article, “Why Facts Don’t Change Our Minds.” In it he discusses how the best way to change someone’s mind is to be friends with them. He cites the below passage from the British philosopher, Alain de Botton, who suggests sharing meals together with those who disagree with us:

“Sitting down at a table with a group of strangers has the incomparable and odd benefit of making it a little more difficult to hate them with impunity. Prejudice and ethnic strife feed off abstraction. However, the proximity required by a meal – something about handing dishes around, unfurling napkins at the same moment, even asking a stranger to pass the salt – disrupts our ability to cling to the belief that the outsiders who wear unusual clothes and speak in distinctive accents deserve to be sent home or assaulted. For all the large-scale political solutions which have been proposed to salve ethnic conflict, there are few more effective ways to promote tolerance between suspicious neighbours than to force them to eat supper together.”

Seeing live theatre can be like sharing a meal together. It takes about the same amount of time, we’re a captive audience who’ve shown up for a singular purpose, and we’re all strangers gathered together in one location.

As theatre-makers, we’d be wise to remember the enormous opportunity we have to open people’s hearts. And the way to open hearts and minds is to only produce what we’re passionate about. With excellence and generosity. For ourselves, our fellow artists and the audience we seek to serve.

P.S. – Today is October 1st, the first day of the fourth quarter of 2020. We’re in the home stretch! How’d your third quarter commitment go? What intentions, goals, projects or habits can you commit to in this last quarter? Make sure voting, continued self care and caring/looking out for others are on your list. Oh, and enjoying the upcoming Holidays!

It will never be the right time to embark on your passion project.

But there won’t ever be a better time than right now.