Friendship Over Facts

James Clear wrote this excellent article, “Why Facts Don’t Change Our Minds.” In it he discusses how the best way to change someone’s mind is to be friends with them. He cites the below passage from the British philosopher, Alain de Botton, who suggests sharing meals together with those who disagree with us:

“Sitting down at a table with a group of strangers has the incomparable and odd benefit of making it a little more difficult to hate them with impunity. Prejudice and ethnic strife feed off abstraction. However, the proximity required by a meal – something about handing dishes around, unfurling napkins at the same moment, even asking a stranger to pass the salt – disrupts our ability to cling to the belief that the outsiders who wear unusual clothes and speak in distinctive accents deserve to be sent home or assaulted. For all the large-scale political solutions which have been proposed to salve ethnic conflict, there are few more effective ways to promote tolerance between suspicious neighbours than to force them to eat supper together.”

Seeing live theatre can be like sharing a meal together. It takes about the same amount of time, we’re a captive audience who’ve shown up for a singular purpose, and we’re all strangers gathered together in one location.

As theatre-makers, we’d be wise to remember the enormous opportunity we have to open people’s hearts. And the way to open hearts and minds is to only produce what we’re passionate about. With excellence and generosity. For ourselves, our fellow artists and the audience we seek to serve.

P.S. – Today is October 1st, the first day of the fourth quarter of 2020. We’re in the home stretch! How’d your third quarter commitment go? What intentions, goals, projects or habits can you commit to in this last quarter? Make sure voting, continued self care and caring/looking out for others are on your list. Oh, and enjoying the upcoming Holidays!

Just Use It

“A writer–and I believe, generally all persons–must think that whatever happens to him or her is a resource. All things have been given to us for a purpose and an artist must feel this more intensely. All that happens to us, including our humiliations, our misfortunes, our embarrassments, all is given to us as raw material, as clay, so that we may shape our art.” -Jorge Luis Borges

“A blazing fire makes flame and brightness out of everything that is thrown into it.” -Marcus Aurelius

The essence of Stoic teaching is that we can’t control what happens to us, we can only control our response. If we can look at everything that happens to us–especially suffering–as fuel for our art, as something we can use, as a way to help others, then we will endure and come out stronger. We can have the GOOD mindset. We can be like Thomas Edison who at 67 while watching his factory burn down, told his son to enjoy the fire, and was genuinely excited about the prospect of starting over.

Whatever happens, use it.

Use it to create.

Use it to help.

Use it to inspire.

Use it to strengthen.

Use it to love.

Just use it.

Failure?

Just as important as it is to define success for yourself, it’s equally important to define failure. Otherwise, you get caught up in other people’s definition.

There’s a lovely, heartbreaking scene at the end of Albert Brooks’ film, “Mother.” In it, he looks at his mom and discovers her in a whole new light and says: “For the first time, I don’t see you as my mother, I see you as a failure, and it’s wonderful!” She delicately responds–hurt, but covering–“I’m a failure and that’s wonderful?…Alright, honey, if that’s what you need.”

She doesn’t see herself that way. She has her own definition of what failure is. And she’s so comfortable with it that she doesn’t get defensive. She loves her son and just wants him to have peace of mind.

Once we own success and failure for ourselves and not the world, then we’re free to make the art we want. Life the life we want. Make the change we seek to make.

We’re only a success or failure if we haven’t lived up to our own definitions. And it’s okay if those definitions change over time. They should as we change.

But we must define these terms.

Otherwise the world will do it for us.

Conflict, Conflict, Conflict!

jan - POPVINYLS.COM

“Write this at the top of your script”…(To borrow a phrase from a director friend.)

CONFLICT.

CONFLICT.

CONFLICT.

You must find CONFLICT in every scene. Even when it’s not readily apparent.

If not, it’s the death of your art. You’ll be boring. And the story won’t get told.

No one goes to the theatre to watch people hang out, play nice or avoid ruffling feathers.

They go to watch people believe desperately in what they’re doing. That they’re right and have all the answers. That they love and care about the other person so much that they’ll fight like hell to change them.

That’s our job as artists. To go to those uncomfortable places. Like firefighters who run into the fire, we must run into the conflict. Instead of away from it.

The reward for our bravery is the chance to entertain and move people. To possibly engender greater empathy and understanding for the human condition. Maybe even change people’s hearts and minds.

Leave Your Homework At The Door

The paradox: you need to do the work so that you have the confidence to forget the work.

It’s about getting out of your head. Being alive. Fully present. Living moment to moment.

And the way to do that is to prepare like crazy beforehand, but then drop that preparation the minute you step out on that stage or on that field.

Some examples:

An athlete relentlessly drills so that on gameday, muscle memory takes over.

A writer does tons of thinking and research so that when they sit down to write a scene, it flows effortlessly from their fingertips.

A director obsesses over story and shots so that when they arrive on set, they can adjust to whatever conditions inevitably arise.

An actor goes over their lines a thousand times, writes a detailed character backstory, has a strong action for every beat, etc….so that when they step onstage, they can live truthfully under imaginary circumstances.

Put another way…no one wants to see or read your hard work, research and preparation. That’s boring. But you still need to do it.

So that you can drop it.

Because we want to see creativity. Spontaneity. The now. As if it’s happening for the first time.

We want to see your magic.

That’s what breaks through, what gets remembered.

More Zoom Thoughts

Back in April, I wrote this post detailing my early Zoom experience. It’s been five months and in that time, I’ve participated in and hosted tons more Zoom readings and gatherings. Everything I wrote about in April still holds. Here are a few added thoughts:

  • Zoom doesn’t replace…I’ve seen some incredible Zoom readings. But even at their very best, they just make you long for the theatre even more. You can’t help but think, “As good as this reading was, how good would it be to see it live, with the actors right in front of you? With a beautiful set and lighting and costumes and sound design. To share this magical experience with others. To discuss the play over drinks in the lobby afterwards. Meet the artists involved…I can’t wait to be in the theatre again!”
  • Zoom can augment the work…Because it’s always been difficult to get people together in a location at a specific time, a lot of useful work can’t always get done. Zoom removes that time and space barrier. Should they want, actors can rehearse more. Directors can communicate more. Designers can collaborate more. In theory, this enhanced rehearsal, communication and collaboration should deepen the work, make for better overall productions and a smoother process throughout.
  • Zoom creates new opportunities to make art and get the word out about our art…One example: At Vs., we do play readings every Tuesday night. Prior to Covid, we did them in person at the theatre. Now we do them on Zoom. If we had 20 people show up in person, that was a really good night. Now we routinely draw double that number and from all over the country. In a few cases, overseas! So many more people can participate and get to know Vs. When things go back, yes we’ll resume Tuesday Night readings in person. But we will definitely add Zoom readings on another night. And when in production, we’ll be thinking about ways to communicate to our audience over Zoom. Maybe a live table read. Or single scene presentation. Or the actors, directors, designers and crew discuss their love of the material. We can show our passion in action.

So let us embrace and be thankful for this technology. The more we lean into and use it, the deeper our work, the longer our reach, and the more excited people will be to see live theatre again.

Go make (Zoom) art with your friends.

Encouragement

One of the greatest gifts you can give another human being, especially someone who has made the brave leap to try and do something new, is your encouragement.

Encourage them early and often throughout their process.

They might not tell you they need it. But they need it. And want it. We all do.

Your gift of constant encouragement is priceless.

Opening Night

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Still from OPENING NIGHT by John Cassavetes

As theatre actors, we’ve more than likely been part of one of those productions where the rehearsal process is a disaster, but then magically comes together on opening night. No movie portrays this better than John Cassavetes’ film, Opening Night. Gena Rowlands is other-wordly great. It’s brutal to watch at times, but worth it for her performance alone.

While not ideal conditions, what is it that enables these productions to come together? Is it that chaos can become fuel? Or is it simply that by virtue of setting a date, you’re on the hook? Just like taking a test, it’s happening on the day. Pass or fail, disaster or triumph, you’re still going up. Knowing this and employing Parkinson’s Law, everyone pulls it together at the last minute.

But the only way magic can ever occur…is when you actually set a date in the first place.