The Vs. Studio Blog

Not-knowing is true knowledge.
Presuming to know is a disease.
First realize that you are sick;
then you can move toward health.

When they think that they know the answers,
people are difficult to guide.
When they know that they don’t know,
people can find their own way. -Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching (Stephen Mitchell translation)

“Inspiration is not the exclusive privilege of poets or artists generally. There is, has been, and will always be a certain group of people whom inspiration visits. It’s made up of all those who’ve consciously chosen their calling and do their job with love and imagination. It may include doctors, teachers, gardeners – and I could list a hundred more professions. Their work becomes one continuous adventure as long as they manage to keep discovering new challenges in it. Difficulties and setbacks never quell their curiosity. A swarm of new questions emerges from every problem they solve. Whatever inspiration is, it’s born from a continuous “I don’t know.”

This is why I value that little phrase “I don’t know” so highly. It’s small, but it flies on mighty wings. It expands our lives to include the spaces within us as well as those outer expanses in which our tiny Earth hangs suspended. If Isaac Newton had never said to himself “I don’t know,” the apples in his little orchard might have dropped to the ground like hailstones and at best he would have stooped to pick them up and gobble them with gusto.

Had my compatriot Marie Sklodowska-Curie never said to herself “I don’t know”, she probably would have wound up teaching chemistry at some private high school for young ladies from good families, and would have ended her days performing this otherwise perfectly respectable job. But she kept on saying “I don’t know,” and these words led her, not just once but twice, to Stockholm, where restless, questing spirits are occasionally rewarded with the Nobel Prize.

Poets, if they’re genuine, must also keep repeating “I don’t know.” Each poem marks an effort to answer this statement, but as soon as the final period hits the page, the poet begins to hesitate, starts to realize that this particular answer was pure makeshift that’s absolutely inadequate to boot. So the poets keep on trying, and sooner or later the consecutive results of their self-dissatisfaction are clipped together with a giant paperclip by literary historians and called their “oeuvre.” -Polish poet Wislawa Szymborska, excerpt from her Nobel Prize acceptance speech in 1996

“As for me, all I know is that I know nothing.” -Socrates

“In the end is my beginning.” -T.S. Eliot, poem Four Quartets

“I Don’t Know” is brave, honest, vulnerable and empowering. Continuously say it.

At the Start (when you have no idea if it will work or how you will get through it): “I Don’t Know.”

During the Middle (regardless if you’re making progress or not): “I Don’t Know.”

In the End (after you’ve solved it or completed your project): “I Don’t Know.”

The continuous “I Don’t Know” allows you to always have beginner’s mind, and an open eye and heart. It keeps things fresh, thereby inspiring you for the next project, problem or artistic endeavor you wish to tackle.

P.S. – Hat tip to the always excellent Poetic Outlaws Substack for the Nobel speech by Wislawa Szymborska. You can read it in its entirety Here.

P.P.S. – Speaking of remarkable Polish women and the Nobel Prize…Marie Curie is the first woman to win a Nobel, the first person to win it twice, and the only person to win it for two different scientific fields. For a great Marginalian article on Marie Curie, click Here. And read the poem Power by Adrienne Rich here.

“So, what is hope, and what is hope for? Hope is an emotional temper that emboldens the heart to be active, it is a condition, a mood, an aura of being. It is a feat of the imagination, both courageous and ingenious, a vitality that inspires us to take innovative action to defend the world. Hope is essential to our survival and our flourishing.

We achieve this vitality of spirit by rejecting the relentless promotion of despair and opening our eyes to the beauty of things, however imperilled, degraded, or difficult to love the world may appear to be. We try to view the world not as it is packaged, presented and sold to us but as we imagine it could be. We do not look away from the world, we look directly at it and allow the spirit of hope – the necessary driver of change — to inspire us to action.” -Nick Cave, The Red Hand Files

“Alone, we can do so little; together, we can do so much.” -Helen Keller

Join us tonight, January 14th, at 6:30pm PT for a special Vs. Tuesday Night Zoom. It’s a chance for everyone affected by these wildfires (directly and indirectly) to share, to grieve, to uplift and to hold space together. It’s also an opportunity for us all to explore and strategize the most efficacious ways to help those in need.

If you’re not already on the Vs. readings email list, but want to join tonight’s Zoom, drop me a line (jclark@vstheatre.org) and I’ll forward you all the info.

If you can’t join tonight but have ideas or links you’d like me to share with the group, drop me a line and I will do so.

Stay safe out there there. We’ll get through this. Together.

P.S. – For a good list of resources and ways to help, click Here. (h/t to Arts For LA for providing)

“If you are genetically endowed with an optimistic bias, you hardly need to be told that you are a lucky person—you already feel fortunate. An optimistic attitude is largely inherited, and it is part of a general disposition for well-being, which may also include a preference for seeing the bright side of everything. If you were allowed one wish for your child, seriously consider wishing him or her optimism. Optimists are normally cheerful and happy, and therefore popular; they are resilient in adapting to failures and hardships, their chances of clinical depression are reduced, their immune system is stronger, they take better care of their health, they feel healthier than others and are in fact likely to live longer. -Daniel Kahneman, Thinking, Fast and Slow

“You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end — which you can never afford to lose — with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.” -Jim Stockdale (Medal of Honor winner who spent 8 years as a P.OW. in Vietnam)

“Hope” is the thing with feathers –
That perches in the soul –
And sings the tune without the words –
And never stops – at all –

And sweetest – in the Gale – is heard –
And sore must be the storm –
That could abash the little Bird
That kept so many warm –

I’ve heard it in the chillest land –
And on the strangest Sea –
Yet – never – in Extremity,
It asked a crumb – of me. -poem “Hope is the thing with feathers” by Emily Dickinson

Optimism is great, but it’s not enough. For those really difficult and uncertain times, when circumstances are brutal, when you don’t know if you’re gonna make it through, when you don’t see any light in the distance, when you can’t possibly fathom how this story ends well, enter hope.

Hope is mysterious and mystical. Hope is relational. It’s trust in one another and something much bigger and more powerful than just yourself and your optimistic mindset.

You don’t need to know how or when you will get through this. You just need to know and have constant hope that you will.

That hope and trust is what allows you to take the necessary steps and actions to just get through this minute, this hour, this day. And to help each other do the same.

Day by day.

One foot in front of the other.

You will get through it.

We will get through it.

Well I don’t know about your right and wrong
I got a muse from the east to the west
All I know is if I never said it before
I’m going to say it with my last breath

I will never forget your healing hands my love
I thought my heart had stopped
I swore I had given up
I will never forget your healing hands my love
You gave me daylight you gave me sunlight -song “Healing Hands” by Citizen Cope

It’s been incredibly heartwarming to see Angelenos coming together to help one another during these fires. I thought to share a beautiful story about the power of art, brotherhood and radical generosity. (Courtesy of George Bothamley and his always excellent “Art Every Day” Substack, I’ve cut and paste it below. You can also read it directly on his site Here. )

For a long time, Albrecht Dürer’s drawing of these praying hands was interpreted as being kind of self portrait – i.e the artist seems to be depicting his own hands as a symbol of both his spiritual and artistic devotion.

But, actually, the truth about this picture is that the hands actually belong to the artist’s brother – Albert Dürer

And for the real story behind its deeper meaning, we need to briefly go back to when the two brothers were growing up in poverty together; in a small town just outside of Nuremberg.

Albert was the eldest of the two brothers, but they were always very close; and in sharing a mutual love of art, they would spend many happy days together making drawings, or dreaming of becoming professional painters when they grew up.

Back then, the artistic talent in both young boys was undeniable – so, had they been born into a wealthier family, there would have been no question that the two of them would have been sent off to study together in an academy, or for a joint apprenticeship under a master painter in Nuremberg.

But, sadly, the Dürer family were struggling financially at this time due to Albrecht the elder’s business as a goldsmith taking a bit of a down turn. 

And in the 15th century – much like now – being an artist was not always the most lucrative field to go into.

So, when the brothers were on the cusp of coming of age, they settled on a little agreement together.

They knew that it could be possible for at least one of them to go on to study art professionally, as long as the other stayed behind to take care of the family.

Thus, in an attempt at the fairest possible way of making this decision, they put their future fate on a coin toss. 

Heads for Albert – Tails for Albrecht.

In other words, if the coin landed on heads – then Albert would go off to pursue artistic training in Nuremburg; and the younger Albrecht would instead take a job as a labourer in the local mine, to support to family.

And if it landed on tails . . . then roles would be reversed. Albrecht would go to Nuremburg – Albert would stay behind.

The coin was tossed – and it was the younger brother who came out as the luckier of the two.

Thus, only a few weeks later, Albrecht Dürer was on his way to the city, with a letter of recommendation to become an artist apprentice. And Albert, just as he promised, stayed in the family home . . . taking a job in the local coal mine.

A few years passed – and clearly the result of the brother’s coin toss paid off.

Albert’s work was physically exhausting – but it helped keep the family above the poverty line until business picked up again. 

And Albrecht excelled so much in his painting apprenticeship, that he found himself rather unexpectedly set en-route to becoming the most sought after artists in all of Germany.

At only 21 years old – soon after painting the portrait seen below- the young man returned to his home town like a celebrity. But, of course, Albrecht still carried with him a certain amount of guilt about all his success too.

He was deeply aware of just how much of a sacrifice his brother had made for him. And he couldn’t escape the thought that, if a simply coin toss had gone a different way, all of this success would have been Albert’s instead.

So, one evening – when the two brothers finally had some alone time together at their family home – Albrecht said to his brother

“Brother, listen to me. You’ve sacrificed so much for all of us . . . isn’t it time you followed your dream too? You know, I am earning well now. I can provide for everyone quite comfortably. And you don’t have to go back down to those mines anymore. Come with me . . . come to Nuremberg! I’ll help you get started as a painter – and we’ll achieve what we both dreamt about all those years ago together. You will create marvellous things, I’m sure of it!”

But- in spite of his deep gratitude for all that had been said – sadly, Albert could not share his brother’s enthusiasm

“No.” he said “It is not possible. My time has gone now.  Albrecht, look at these hands of mine. You see the fingers? In these few years of work, I have broken all of them – multiple times. And you see these scars? These lumps? These marks where my hands have been beaten, bruised, calloused, and crushed by so much stone. You know . . . I can hardly even hold a knife and fork delicately when I eat, such is my loss of feeling in these hands now. So how could I ever hold a paintbrush or pencil?! No, brother. For me . . . it is too late.”

Then, letting go of his brother once more, Albert brought his broken hands together in prayer – saying

“Come. Let’s just pray together – as we used to when we were children. We should be grateful that you have achieved enough for both of us!”

And clearly, this moment is one that Albrecht would never forget; because it is the very thing he captures in his most famous drawing here – sketched over a decade later, when the two brothers were in their mid to late thirties

Technically, it was designed as a “preparatory” sketch for a larger altarpiece commission that the artist was working on at the time (now destroyed). 

But in all the tenderness and painstaking care taken over the work here – we can see that, for Albrecht, this drawing is so much more than just a study of hands.

In truth, it is an expression of gratitude instead ; paying tribute to his brother’s sacrifice.

And for that reason, the underlying message of this work is that Albrecht Dürer may have been the artist in practice . . . but nonetheless, his entire career was in fact the result of his brother Albert’s hands too!

Our inspiring definition of art is “doing something that might not work in service of others.”

This doesn’t just apply to “artists” or making “art”, but to anyone who feels a calling inside and wants to help.

A little while back my wife sent me this beautiful post about friendship:

When people are going through a particularly difficult time, they often (a) don’t reach out for help and/or (b) are so overwhelmed, they can’t think specifically about what they might need. They need everything. And you can help them by doing the thinking for them. Even if, and this is key, what you think they might need “might not work.” That’s the “art” of your generosity.

These fires are a chance to reach out to anyone we know who has lost their home. Inspired by the above IG post, we might right each to them with a short text and put together a numbered list of specific ways we can help. Including providing the option to decline our offer and just pray for them. As what they might need most right now, is just time and space to process coupled with the knowledge you are there for them.

P.S. – If you’re wanting to help those affected by the fires, this LA Times article provides an updated list of resources and things you can do. Stay safe out there everyone. Take good care of yourselves and each other. We will get through it.

“The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists.” -Japanese Proverb

“We cannot choose our external circumstances, but we can always choose how we respond to them.” -Epictetus

“Nothing is softer or more flexible than water, yet nothing can resist it.” -Lao Tzu

When a crisis or emergency happens, it’s not about anticipating every single problem that could’ve happened with one hundred percent accuracy. That’s impossible. (Though some preparation is always a good thing.)

Far more important, and within your control, is having a flexible mindset to deal with circumstance. Something happens and you quickly have to make a decision. A new thing happens and you have to make a brand new decision. And so on and so forth.

Until the crisis is over.

When it is over, that’s the time to go back and evaluate your decisions. Learn from them and perhaps be a little better prepared for the next one.

But no matter this event or future events, it is your flexible mindset that will get you through it. And you will get through it.

P.S. – Thank you to all those who’ve checked in on us during the fires. It means a lot. Our bags are packed and we’re ready to go at a moment’s notice. But we’re okay and I hope and pray you are too. My heart and prayers go out to all those who have lost homes and been affected by this terrible tragedy.

“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own.” -Epictetus, Discourses

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” -Serenity Prayer

“You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength.” -Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

“The following little reminder sums up the three most essential parts of Stoic philosophy worth carrying with you every day, into every decision:

Control your perceptions. Direct your actions properly. Willingly accept what’s outside your control. That’s all we need to do.” –The Daily Stoic: 366 Meditations on Wisdom, Perseverance, and the Art of Living by Ryan Holiday, Stephen Hanselman

So much of Stoicism is about identifying what is in and out of our control. This not only applies to the events of our lives (reactive), but also to the goals we set for ourselves (proactive).

A good practice is after you set your goals or intentions, immediately ask yourself which are within your control and which are out of your control.

Two examples that might help clarify this point:

(1) You set a goal to win an Academy Award for Best Actor.

Awesome. Nothing wrong with big goals and dreams. Go for it! Just realize this one is not in your control. It is dependent on external forces.

(2) You set a goal to become the best actor you can be.

This one is within your control. You can study, train, observe, read, watch, perform, self-produce, etc…Over the course of a year, two, five, ten, a lifetime…you will inevitably get better and better and “become the best actor you can be.”

Again, there is room for both kinds of goals. Just be aware of the difference. (Another way to differentiate is Stretch vs. SMART goals.)

Oh and by the way, as a result of focusing on your in control goal of “becoming the best actor you can be”, you might just get the out of control goal of “winning the Academy Award” thrown in for free.

“Fame is the peversion of the natural human instinct for validation and attention.” -Heathcote Williams

“I was leery of the media glare that came with film roles. I saw the future for myself when I did repertory theater. These were plays that could change my life; these playwrights were prophets. They made me a better actor, gave me an education, offered me a deeper understanding of the world, and filled me with joy. Who wouldn’t be satisfied with that? I remember feeling I could be perfectly content doing just that.” –Sonny Boy: A Memoir by Al Pacino

Would you sign a “lifetime artist contract” if it included the below clauses?…

-You won’t be famous or recognizable. No one will ever know your name.

-You will make little, if any, money off your art. You will always have to work another job to make ends meet.

-You will rarely, if ever, get picked. More often than not, you will have to pick yourself. That means producing your own work.

-You will be artistically fulfilled. (Provided you consistently commit to finding your passion projects and producing them with excellence and generosity.)

-You will get to make art with your friends and others whose work you respect and admire. As a result of your producing efforts, you will create meaningful experiences for your artist friends as well as the audience who experience your passion in action.

-You will get to do the kind of work that lights you up and made you want to be an artist in the first place.

-You will always stay humble, hungry, motivated, creative, open-minded, and inspired.

Me: “Give me the pen. Where do I sign?”

How about you? (Comments relished!)

“Hard choices, easy life. Easy choices, hard life.” -Jerzy Gregorek, former Olympic weightlifter

Speaking of doing hard things today so that things are easier tomorrow, this past blog post including the story below about Paula Scher:

In 1998, Citibank and The Travelers Insurance Company merged. 

They hired legendary designer Paula Scher to create a new logo.

In their first meeting, on a napkin, Scher drew what became the iconic Citi logo.

As Scher got up to leave the room, someone from the Citi team asked,

How can it be that it’s done in a second?

“It’s done in a second and 34 years,” Scher replied. “It’s done in a second [and] every experience and everything that’s in my head.”

It’s hard today.

Do it anyway.

And then think how easy will it be for you in one, five, ten, twenty,…thirty four years from today.

“Challenges are what makes life interesting and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” -Joshua J. Marine

“When life gets tough, some of us feel that we’ve lost the game and life has won. But life isn’t trying to defeat you. Life isn’t even a participant—the game is yours.” -Mo Gawdat, Solve for Happy

“Your habits are often a byproduct of convenience. Humans are wired to seek the path of least resistance, which means the most convenient option is often the one that wins. Make good choices more convenient and bad choices less so. Behavior will improve naturally.” -James Clear

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds.” -James 1:2

“As Carl Jung put it, ‘Man needs difficulties. They are necessary for health.’ Yet most people instinctually avoid pain. This is true whether we are talking about building the body (e.g., weight lifting) or the mind (e.g., frustration, mental struggle, embarrassment, shame)–and especially true when people confront the harsh reality of their own imperfections.” -Ray Dalio

“Self-esteem comes from achieving something important when it’s hard to do.” -Clayton Christensen

It’s hard today because you’re not yet fully the person you’re meant to be. You might have to learn new skills, increase your capacity or get stronger mentally and physically.

The good news is…when you do hard things, when you freely and joyfully accept challenges, when you allow for some discomfort, you develop all of the above. You grow as a human being.

So much so that the hard things today will feel like a walk in the park tomorrow.