The Vs. Studio Blog

You better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go -Eminem, song “Lose Yourself”

Oh! Move over, Rover
And let Jimi take over -Jimi Hendrix, song “Fire”

For whatever art you’re trying to create, you must bring all of yourself to it. Whether that be writing, acting, painting, etc…the more personal you can make it, the better. The old adage “Find your voice” is really about finding and trusting yourself.

However, at some point in the creative process, it’s no longer about you. It’s about the thing itself. Like the Tom Petty song, the creation now has a “mind with a heart of it’s own.”

Best to get out of the way. Lose yourself. And let the subconscious take over.

You’ve gotta be cruel to be kind, in the right measure
Cruel to be kind, it’s a very good sign
Cruel to be kind, means that I love you, baby
(You’ve gotta be cruel)
You gotta be cruel to be kind -Nick Lowe, song “Cruel To Be Kind”

Being nice is about you.

Being kind is about the other person. And sometimes that means giving honest yet tough feedback to someone. Because you care about them and the work they’re trying to do.

Sarah Jones Simmer, the successful investor and CEO, gives a great example of this distinction on a recent Farnham Street podcast…

Another thing that’s very important to me is kindness, and kindness over niceness. The easiest example I can give is that a kind person will tell you, you have spinach in your teeth and a nice person won’t because it’s uncomfortable, right? But the kind person is going to set you up for a much better rest of your day because you’re not running around with spinach in your teeth.

Choose to be kind over being nice.

P.S. – My wife and I had a good laugh about this idea as I brought up one of our very first dates…She told me I had food in my teeth in the middle of me telling her a story. I got kinda irritated about it at the time (I was embarrassed) thinking she could’ve just ignored it and let me finish. “That would’ve been the nice thing to do.” Now I know, like most things, she was absolutely right. She was being kind. I was being nice.

“Your thoughts are just tiny secretions.” -Jeff Bridges

“To realize you are not your thoughts is when you become spiritually awake.” -Eckhart Tolle

Thoughts are just thoughts. You’ll have thousands upon thousands of them every day. Like an endless stream of running water or breathing, you can’t turn them off. Nor should you. Just be aware that you have them and don’t overweight ’em.

The twelfth century Tibetan yoga Milarepa, composed and sang tons of songs about presence and meditation. In one he says that the “mind has more projections than there are dust motes in a sunbeam” and that “even hundreds of spears couldn’t put an end to that.”

If you find yourself going down the thought rabbit hole or what Allen Ginsberg called the “surprise mind”–where you try to concentrate on something or meditate and then wham! a nasty surprise thought appears–do what Pema Chodron advises in her wonderful book, “When Things Fall Apart”…Pause. Notice what you’re doing. And then label it. Without judgment. Say to yourself or out loud, “I’m Thinking, Thinking, Thinking.” And then return. You might have to do this a lot, especially at first, but realize that every time you do, you’re practicing presence.

Give it a shot. Let me know how it works out.

“Somebody should do something.”

The next time you find yourself thinking or saying those words out loud, realize that YOU are that somebody.

Uncle Ben was close, but it’s actually the other way around….With great responsibility comes great power.

Step up. Make it happen. Make your art. Make the world a better place.

For the actor…

When working on a role, know what your character’s dream is. Assume the other characters all know what that dream is and want it desperately for you too. That way when you don’t get what you want and you don’t hear the dream response to your line, you will fight even harder.

This leads to conflict which gets you out of your head and on to the other person. Which then leads to riveting and alive acting.

“The play’s the thing.” -Shakespeare, Hamlet

It’s not about you.

It’s about the work, the work, the work.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is simply to avail yourself to the work at all times. Ask yourself where best can you fit in? How can you serve the piece? Be a medium. Channel the artistic forces that swirl all around. Strive for excellence and generosity.

And then get out of the way.

P.S. – This message will self destruct in five seconds.

“Nothing in the world is as soft and yielding as water. Yet for dissolving the hard and inflexible, nothing can surpass it.” -Tao Te Ching by Lao-Tzu (Stephen Mitchell translation)

“Be like water my friend.” -Bruce Lee

Take the most amazing, miraculous, purest element in the world–water–yet remove it’s ability to flow, and it too will eventually rot.

Gotta move. Action. Action. Action.

Towards the very end of the movie “Saving Private Ryan”, Captain John Miller (played by Tom Hanks) who’s about to die, tells the young Private James Ryan (played by Matt Damon) to “Earn This…Earn it.”

Make no mistake, we’re here because of the sacrifices so many people made that came before us. In some cases, with their lives. As well as the sacrifices that people make today, day in, day out with no attention, thanks or praise.

To honor all those sacrifices, let us earn this next day, this next hour, this next minute, this next second.

Earn this. Earn it.

“I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know?” -Ernest Hemingway

“Sleep is the best meditation.” — Dalai Lama

Put away the ice cream, turn off the television and the phone and go the f*ck to sleep.

And when you wake up in the morning, read this excellent article from Ryan Holiday on why you should prioritize sleep. There’s no better performance booster and mood enhancer than getting a good night’s rest.

“For unless one is able to live fully in the present, the future is a hoax. There is no point whatever in making plans for a future which you will never be able to enjoy. When your plans mature, you will still be living for some other future beyond. You will never, never be able to sit back with full contentment and say, ‘Now, I’ve arrived!’ Your entire education has deprived you of this capacity because it was preparing you for the future, instead of showing you how to be alive now.” -Alan Watts

Life is not a flatline. It’s peaks and valleys. Realize wherever you are now is just a snapshot, a moment in time. It’s ephemeral. We think we’d like to know what lies ahead so that we can adequately prepare for good times or bad. For the peaks and valleys. But where’s the fun in that?

The fact that every day, every single moment is different?….“Yea, that’s the ticket!”

Lean into not knowing.