Dear friends, ask the hard questions. Give thanks for uncertainty. Trust yourself. Lean into the wisdom of community. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Know that the arc is long. Lean on the ancestors. Ask the creatures for advice. Follow the wind. Know that there is no right way. Trust others on their path. Find yours. Embrace the mess. Give your life to a holy, undeniable “Yes!” Whatever that yes may be. And know, that this “had to happen.” How lucky we are to be alive!
Coleus Plant in a Flower Pot, 1886 Vincent van Gogh
Therefore the Master acts without doing anything and teaches without saying anything. Things arise and she lets them come; things disappear and she lets them go. She has but doesn’t possess, acts but doesn’t expect. When her work is done, she forgets it. That is why it lasts forever. –Tao Te Ching by Lao-Tzu (Stephen Mitchell translation)
Everything that’s important to you, everything you believe is yours…your life, your family, your friends, your time, your talent, your relationships, your work, your health, your wealth, etc…can you think of all these things through the lens of being a steward, rather than an owner?
Amazing things happen when you do.
Stewardship engenders humility. You realize that no matter how hard you worked for it, in the end, everything in your life is a gift.
Stewardship engenders gratitude. Because you know everything is a gift, you appreciate and are thankful for these gifts so much more. Which brings you more joy.
Stewardship engenders love. You’ve been entrusted with these gifts. Love them. Care for them. Nurture them.
Stewardship engenders sacrifice. Don’t hoard or try to possess these gifts. Rather, give them up to the world. That’s how you participate in the infinite loop of grace.
Be the pot to the flower. Help it reach its full beauty and potential.
“The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it.” Michelangelo
Speaking of The Nudge, this anecdote from Economics professor Tyler Cowen…
Yesterday I had lunch with a former Ph.D student of mine, who is now highly successful and tenured at a very good school. I was reminded that, over twenty years ago, I was Graduate Director of Admissions. One of my favorite strategies was to take strong candidates who applied for Masters and also offer them Ph.D admissions, suggesting they might to do the latter. My lunch partner was a beneficiary of this de facto policy.
At least two of our very best students went down this route… neither realized that it was common simply to apply straight to a Ph.D program, skipping over the Masters. I believe this is now better known, but the point is this.
At critical moments in time, you can raise the aspirations of other people significantly, especially when they are relatively young, simply by suggesting they do something better or more ambitious than what they might have in mind. It costs you relatively little to do this, but the benefit to them, and to the broader world, may be enormous. This is in fact one of the most valuable things you can do with your time and with your life.
In addition to believing in someone (especially when they don’t always believe in themselves), one of the greatest gifts you can give another person is to get them to raise their expectations.
Show them what’s possible. Inspire them.
One way to do this is to curate and make great art.
“Great art is the outward expression of an inner life in the artist, and this inner life will result in [their] personal vision of the world.” -Edward Hopper
It seems to me that,
paralleling the paths of action, devotion, etc.,
there is a path called art
and that the sages of the East would recognize
Faulkner, Edward Hopper, Beethoven, William Carlos Williams
and address them as equals.
It’s a matter of intention and discipline, isn’t it? —
combined with a certain amount of God-given ability.
It’s what you’re willing to go through, willing to give, isn’t it?
It’s the willingness to be a window
through which others can see
all the way out to infinity
and all the way back to themselves.
Be the medium. Allow it to happen. Channel your art so others can see and find themselves in your art.
A young man asked Mozart how to write a symphony. Mozart replied, “You’re far too young to write a symphony.” The young man then said, “What? You were writing symphonies when you were 10, and I’m 21.” Mozart smiled and replied, “Yes, but I didn’t go around asking people how to do it.”
Information is abundant, yet action remains scarce.
Ask yourself how often do you actually act on the information you consume and the advice you receive?
“Never underestimate the power of inertia…People have a strong tendency to go along with the status quo or default option…Loss aversion helps produce inertia, meaning a strong desire to stick with your current holdings.” -Richard H. Thaler, book Nudge: Improving Decisions About Health, Wealth, and Happiness
“He already knew he could coach. All you had to do was look at each of your players and ask yourself: What story does this guy wish someone would tell him about himself? And then you told the guy that story. You told it with a hint of doom. You included his flaws. You emphasized his obstacles that could prevent him from succeeding. That was what made the story epic: the player, the hero, had to suffer mightily en route to his final triumph. Schwartz knew that people loved to suffer, as long as the suffering made sense. Everybody suffered. The key was to choose the form of your suffering. Most people couldn’t do this alone, they needed a coach. A good coach made you suffer in a way that suited you.” -Chad Harbach, novel The Art Of Fielding
Do you have someone in your life who truly believes in you and your goals, so much so, that they constantly push you to do better? They hold you accountable. Hold you to a higher standard.
Maybe it’s a parent or close friend? A teacher or coach? Maybe a co-worker?
That person can affectionally be termed “The Nudge.”
Are you afraid to tell The Nudge your dreams and plans because you know they’re gonna constantly remind you of what you said you were gonna do?
Don’t be.
Don’t shun The Nudge.
Instead, be grateful you have The Nudge.
If you don’t have The Nudge, then seek one out. It can make all the difference in your life.
And if you do have one, can you be The Nudge for someone else? You can make a giant difference in their life.
We’d all loved to be recruited, courted, affirmed, wined and dined, told we’re amazing. Get a Godfather offer.
One, it validates us. Who we are and the work we’ve done.
Two, it lets us off the hook from having to choose or decide on a path. Instead, we get chosen.
You can sit around waiting all your life for that offer that’s never gonna come.
Or.
You can work hard to consistently create value, build community, learn new skills all the while, seeking and finding places that light you up inside.
And when you do find those special places, go to them and tell them why they’re amazing, show them all the incredible work you’ve done, ideate all the ways you can help them, and YOU make them an offer they can’t refuse.
“A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:12 and the epigraph from Tarell Alvin McCraney’s powerhouse of a play, The Brothers Size)
“I’m always trying to make the intimate epic, meaning finding a way to grab my personal impulses or the personal impulses that I see in other human beings and activate them in a way that allows the theatrical engagement to be epic.” -Tarell Alvin McCraney
This past Wednesday night I saw a dynamite production of The Brothers Size at the Geffen Playhouse. We had a great turnout from our Vs. Theatre Club.
A friend and attendee said to me, “When I read the email Johnny, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to see the show. But then I clicked on the video you included where the playwright talks about how much the play means to him, and I got my ticket right away…I’m so glad I did.”
(The video he was referring to is this one. It’s with playwright and Geffen Artistic Director, Tarell Alvin McCraney. Give it a watch.)
If you want people to come see the art you’ve made, tell them why you made it. Why it matters to you. Get personal. Share as much as you can.
Because when you share your why, they (your intended audience) will now have their why. And when they do, they’ll show up.
P.S. – Go see The Brothers Size. It’s fantastic. The writing is masterful, the direction is spot on and the actors are sublime. For tix/info, click Here. Use discount code “Size20” for $20 tickets now through August 21.
My very first blog post was about the formula. One of the components was meaningful work (the other was meaningful community).
If you’re searching for meaningful work or wanting to create it for others (or both), here are some qualities to look out for:
(1) AGENCY. You get some say in the kind of work you do. And you have some decision-making autonomy.
(2) PROGRESS. You can see the fruits of your labor pay off.
(3) CONTRIBUTION. Your work makes things better for others.
(4) FUN. More often than not, you and others have fun. The work can still be hard and challenging (fun often stems from meeting these challenges) and have un-fun components, but on the whole, you really enjoy it.
(5) DEEP WORK/FLOW. You often find yourself fully engaged in what you’re doing. You reach a flow state.
(6) LEARNING. You’re constantly learning new skills. Growing. Getting better.
(7) PRIDE. You’re proud of your work, your organization and the contribution that you’re making. So much so, you enjoy talking about it with others.
Of course no job is perfect and not all of these categories will harmoniously line up, but the categories are worth thinking about. So…
Do you have this in your current job? If not, can you find it? Or find more of it? What are the opportunities to do so?
If you’re in any kind of leadership position, ask yourself how you can increase one or more of these categories for your team.
P.S. – If there are some other categories you think of, please let me know in the comments. Thanks!
The Chinese bamboo tree can grow to be nearly 100 feet tall—but it’s how it achieves that growth that makes it even more interesting.
After being planted in the ground, it requires daily watering and nurturing.
And then, nothing happens: Despite the effort, days, weeks, months, and even years go by with no signs of any growth.
Two years, three years, four years pass, with continued daily inputs and not so much as a break in the surface to show for it.
But suddenly, in the fifth year, everything changes:
The Chinese bamboo tree breaks through the surface, and in the span of just six weeks, grows up to 90-feet-tall.
The story of the Chinese bamboo tree’s growth offers a powerful lesson for life (from an unlikely source):
Your growth can be hard to see. It occurs silently, under the surface. You make the daily investments in yourself, but are completely unaware of their impact.
Growth often happens slowly, and then all at once.
The challenge is that if you don’t recognize your own growth in its most subtle, hidden forms, you may become discouraged on the journey, lose your motivation, and stop marching forward.
But rest assured, the growth is happening—you just need to look in the right places to find it.
Again, when you set out to achieve anything, it’s important to have metrics to consistently measure your progress. That way, even if no one else sees the bamboo, you won’t be discouraged. Because you know it’s there all along, growing, getting stronger.
And when it finally does emerge, that bamboo and you will soar to incredible heights.
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