There will be thunder then. Remember me. Say ‘ She asked for storms.’ The entire world will turn the colour of crimson stone, and your heart, as then, will turn to fire.
That day, in Moscow, a true prophecy, when for the last time I say goodbye, soaring to the heavens that I longed to see, leaving my shadow here in the sky. -Anna Akhmatova, poem Thunder
(Hat tip to Margo Aaron for inspiring this blog post)
Don’t ask the question, “Should I write?” (Insert any kind of artform for “write”)
Instead ask, “Do I want to write?”
We need and want your art. Now more than ever. But do you have the desire to create it? And, do you have the guts to be vulnerable and share it with all of us?
George Saunders tells a story on Cheryl Strayed’s new podcast Sugar Calling about the Russian poet, Anna Akhmatova…
“[Anna’s] husband was shot and her son arrested during the Stalinist purges.
One day, she was standing outside the prison with hundreds of other women in similar situations. It’s Russian cold, and they have to go there every day, wait for hours in this big, open yard, then get the answer that today and every day, there will be no news.
But every day, they keep coming back.
A woman, recognizing [Anna] as the famous poet, says, ‘Poet, can you write this?’ And Akhmatova thinks about it for a second and goes, ‘Yes.’”
“I don’t trust my inner feelings, you know feelings come and go” -Leonard Cohen, song That Don’t Make It Junk
“I’ve got a feeling, a feeling deep inside Oh yeah, oh yeah I’ve got a feeling, a feeling I can’t hide Oh no, oh no, oh no Yeah, I’ve got a feeling” -The Beatles, song I’ve Got a Feeling
Setting deadlines are like working out. Very often, you don’t feel like doing it. At times, you’ll even feel resentful of them.
But just like after a work out, you always feel exceptional when you meet your deadline. You’re grateful that you had one to make.
“Why, then, ’tis none to you, for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” -Shakespeare, Hamlet
“You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this and you will find strength.” -Marcus Aurelius, Meditations
The next time you find yourself about to complain, about to lament some perceived misfortune or bad break, try to catch yourself. Bring awareness to what you’re thinking and see if you can make a single conjunction switch.
Which is…replace “but” with “and.”
For example, let’s say you planned a family trip to Disneyland. You got everything packed, kids are ready to go and you’re about to head out on your drive. You notice it’s raining outside.
Instead of thinking, “Awww crap. We planned this whole fun trip, but now it’s raining.” Which immediately shuts you down and gets you feeling upset or disappointed.
Think “We planned this whole fun trip and now it’s raining.”
What happens?
You’re open to problem solving, possibility, adventure. You spring into action. You might now think about how less crowded it’ll be. More rides! Maybe you get some ponchos or garbage bags. See how much fun you can all have in the rain. Whatever. The point is, you no longer judge external events that are beyond your control. You just flow with them.
There’s a reason the cornerstone of improvisation is “Yes. And….”
“Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout of some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand.” -George Orwell
“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.” -Marcus Aurelius
“Okay Motherfucker!” -Al Pacino as “Vincent Hanna” in the film Heat
You got inspired by something you saw or read and decided “I want to do THAT.”
Once you decide though, don’t think everything’s gonna be smooth sailing from here on out. Quite the opposite. You will be tested.
What will help you endure the trial is your expectations.
Expect the struggle. Expect it to be hard. Expect there to be many days when you feel like giving up.
Go a step further…
Want it to be hard. Want to be tested. Want to see how you measure up. Be grateful you have a worthy opponent. For the obstacle becomes the way.
Say to the world, just like Vincent Hanna does Here…
“if you can’t measure it, you can’t change or improve it.” -Peter Drucker
“I often say that when you can measure what you are speaking about, and express it in numbers, you know something about it; but when you cannot measure it, when you cannot express it in numbers, your knowledge is of a meagre and unsatisfactory kind.” -Lord Kelvin
The two most important documents in your producer’s toolkit are the work plan and the budget. We go into great detail on both in The Vs. Studio Producing Workshop and I’ve discussed the work plan in a prior post. Below are some basic budgeting principles…(I use the example of producing a stage play but the principles apply to any passion project.)
(1) Just like the work plan, the budget is a living document. It’s fungible and changes every time you gather more information on your project. Once you create the budget, you need to constantly update it (at least once a week).
(2) Be ruthlessly honest. Figure out ALL costs and include them. Don’t leave anything out. Don’t assume you can get things for free or cheap. (Maybe you really can lower costs, but that producing work comes later.) Figure out what it will realistically cost for now, and budget accordingly.
(3) Err on the side of generosity when it comes to paying people. Yes it’s theatre and as such, there’s no money to be made. But generously paying people (your artists, your stage crew, etc…) is the right thing to do. Always. Always. Always.
(4) Make your budget well in advanceof opening night. You need numbers BEFORE pre-production. A huge part of the decision to go forward with a project is whether or not you can afford the vision you have for it. You’re excited about the play and don’t want to lose momentum, I get it. But you gotta know what it will actually cost to produce. This is where time is your ally. Why you need a long runway. So you can make an accurate budget. Talk to others who’ve done it before. Ask tons of questions and get specific costs. You wouldn’t buy a house if you couldn’t afford it, right? The same thing applies here. Careless optimism—thinking it’ll all just “work out”–doesn’t win the day.
(5) Don’t rely on ticket sales to fund your project. A useful exercise…Assume you’re not gonna sell one single ticket and strive to have enough money in the bank to still pay for the production. You wanna know that if the proverbial shit hits the fan and it’s a total disaster, you’ll still be okay. (It won’t be a disaster, but better to have peace of mind so you can then focus on making the art the best it can possibly be.)
(6) Have a contingency line item. This should be 10% of your overall budget. So for example if costs amount to $20,000, add an additional $2,000 Your final budget is now $22,000. This way, you can cover any unforeseen expenses or overages. (Hopefully you won’t have to use the contingency but again, it’s always nice to know it’s there.)
There are several other budgeting principles we cover in the producer’s workshop, but this is a great start.
The actress Dakota Johnson says as much in this recent LA Times interview. She discusses her motivation on founding her production company, Teatime Pictures….
As an actress, especially when the film comes out, I’m always finding myself bumping up against something. I’m finding either it’s like, ‘Oh, that’s not what I signed on to. That is not the film I wanted to make or that we talked about making.’ Cause for so long, my career has been, I prep and I show up and I do my work, and then that’s it. And I’ll come in for ADR and then I’ll promote the s— out of your movie and I’ll traipse myself around red carpets. And you don’t have any say in how it turns out, and your integrity as an artist is kind of stunted.
Of course there’s things that are stressful in terms of like, ‘OK, how do we do this? How do we get around this problem and save money?’ All the things that are so unsexy about making movies, but then I feel better about it. I feel like every single decision that is made can be made with artistic integrity, it can be creative. It can be, ‘OK, how do we make this work but still push the boundaries a little bit, still reach the hearts that need to be reached?’
It’s not about control. It’s about contribution. It’s about collaboration. It’s about really reaching for an idea and sticking to it and maintaining the integrity of whatever story is trying to be told.
Growing up on-set and experiencing so many conversations around this job and this industry and the people in it and then having my own career for the last 14 years, I think I just want to make a difference. I want to make it better. I want to have a better experience. I want to give more opportunities to amazing people to make things.
“We lose our way when we lose our why.” -Michael Hyatt
We’re 24 days into 2022. How are those resolutions coming?
Do you know that January 19th is known worldwide as “Quitter’s Day?” A recent study of 800 million daily activities revealed that’s when motivation likely runs out and resolutions get abandoned.
So if you’re still going strong, congrats! You made it five days past Quitter’s Day. Keep up the great work.
If you’ve quit or are losing steam, don’t fret. Look at your list again. Recommit to and strengthen your “why” for each item. And if you never did a “why” in the first place, now’s your chance. Doing this exercise will help big time.
To continue working at and complaining about that soul sucking job or start the search for a new one.
To go make your art or continue waiting to get picked.
Okay okay, I know, you get my drift.
Once we realize that EVERYTHING is a decision, that we have agency, that we control the single most important thing, which is how we spend our time, because as Anne Dillard brilliantly puts it, “how we spend our days is how we spend our lives,” then we can actually do something about it. We can finally hear and connect to that little voice inside. That voice that calls us to our vocation. That urges us to fulfill our potential. That wants us to make change. Make our art. Make the world better a better place.
Or…Not. That’s a decision too.
The writer Mark Manson talks about this in a recent blog post. He writes…
Feeling like we have choices gives us a sense of control and autonomy over our lives. And that feeling of control and autonomy just so happens to be one of the best predictors of wellbeing and happiness we’ve figured out so far.
And yet, despite this simple power of choice, humans have an almost endless capacity for denial.
We deny we have choices when inaction is more comfortable, when our identity is at stake, and/or when we think playing the victim will get us an instant dose of sympathy or even pity.
But denial only gives us short-term relief in exchange for long-term pain—and that’s a terrible investment in your life.
Your reactions, your perspectives, where you place your attention… all of it—it’s all your choice.
And you don’t get to sit this one out.
Not making a choice—or denying you have one in the first place—is still a choice.
“I’m not saying that you have to be a reader to save your soul in the modern world. I’m saying it helps.” -Walter Mosley
Pound for pound, can you think of a better investment of your time and money than a book? I can’t.
All that research. All that knowledge and wisdom. All those life lessons and experiences. All that vulnerability. All that dedication to craft (It took Karl Malantes thirty years to write “Matterhorn.” THIRTY YEARS.) All that artistry.
As Ryan Holiday states…
Books are an investment in yourself—investments that come in many forms: novels, nonfiction, how-to, poetry, classics, biographies. They help you think more clearly, be kinder, see the bigger picture, and improve at the things that matter to you. Books are a tradition that stretches back thousands of years and stretches forward to today, where people are still publishing distillations of countless hours of hard thinking on hard topics. Why wouldn’t you avail yourself of this wisdom?
Cmon. It’s a no brainer.
Put down the phone and go read a book. I promise, you’ll be glad you did.
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