“The first principle is not to fool yourself – and you are the easiest person to fool.” -Richard P. Feynman
General William T. Sherman: “Well, Grant, we’ve had the devil’s own day, haven’t we?”
General Ulysses S. Grant: “Yes…Lick ’em tomorrow, though.” – Conversation between the two generals after the first day of the Battle of Shiloh during the American Civil War
“I did the best I could” is an admirable goal and something we should all shoot for. But at the end of the day it’s just a feeling. It’s entirely subjective and up to you.
Don’t fool or lie to yourself.
If at the end of the day, you feel you came up short, analyze why. Then forgive yourself. Turn the page. And go get after it tomorrow.
: continued effort to do or achieve something despite difficulties, failure, or opposition : the action or condition or an instance of persevering : STEADFASTNESS
“I will persist until I succeed. The prizes of life are at the end of each journey, not near the beginning, and it is not given to me to know how many steps are necessary in order to reach my goal. Failure I may still encounter at the thousandth step, yet success hides behind the next bend in the road. Never will I know how close it lies unless I turn the corner. Always will I take another step. If that is no avail, I will take another, and yet another. In truth, one step at a time is not too difficult. I will persist until I succeed.” -Og Mandino, The Greatest Salesman In The World
“If you are going through hell, keep going.” – Winston S. Churchill
“Real courage is when you know you’re licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what.” – Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” – Nelson Mandela
“The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.” – Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture
What’s common among all stories of people who show tremendous courage and perseverance–from ancient tales of the Spartans to Biblical narratives like the Canaanite woman to Louis Zamperini in “Unbroken” to today’s single parent working multiple jobs to provide a better life for their child–is they all have no idea if what they’re doing will actually work. In fact, the initial feedback is that it’s not working and they should just give up.
So what is it that allows these folks to persist against all odds and evidence to the contrary?
I believe it’s the following:
A burning desire.
An unwavering and at times, irrational belief in themselves and their mission.
A refusal to give up.
And as my favorite actor Jack Lemmon said about his own career…”blind faith.”
P.S. – Pictured above is the Mars rover. It’s been looking for signs of life on Mars since landing there on 2021. 960 days and counting. Nothing yet. But not giving up. Its name?…Perseverance.
“A finite game is played for the purpose of winning, an infinite game for the purpose of continuing the play. -James P. Carse, book Finite and Infinite Games: A Vision of Life as Play and Possibility
A finite game is one bounded by rules and time. Think of your favorite sporting event for example. Whoever has the most points at the end of the set period wins. To win is the purpose of the game.
An infinite game is boundless. Wins, losses and keeping score do not matter. The purpose of the games is to just keep playing.
Can you turn your passion project into an infinite game? Sure, there might be finite games/measuring sticks along the way. But overall, as long as you get to keep playing, keep making, keep learning, keep growing…that’s the win.
Put another way…if you’re alive and are pursuing something you care deeply about, you won. Now, keep playing.
P.S. – Can you guess what movie the above image is from?
“God’s one and only voice is silence.” -Herman Melville
“I need to be alone. I need to ponder my shame and my despair in seclusion; I need the sunshine and the paving stones of the streets without companions, without conversation, face to face with myself, with only the music of my heart for company.” – Henry Miller, Tropic of Cancer
“How much better is silence; the coffee cup, the table. How much better to sit by myself like the solitary sea-bird that opens its wings on the stake. Let me sit here for ever with bare things, this coffee cup, this knife, this fork, things in themselves, myself being myself.” ― Virginia Woolf, The Waves
“You have a grand gift for silence, Watson. It makes you quite invaluable as a companion.” – Arthur Conan Doyle, The Complete Sherlock Holmes
Hello darkness, my old friend I’ve come to talk with you again Because a vision softly creeping Left its seeds while I was sleeping And the vision that was planted in my brain Still remains Within the sound of silence
In restless dreams I walked alone Narrow streets of cobblestone ‘Neath the halo of a street lamp I turned my collar to the cold and damp When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light That split the night And touched the sound of silence
And in the naked light I saw Ten thousand people, maybe more People talking without speaking People hearing without listening People writing songs that voices never share No one dared Disturb the sound of silence -Simon & Garfunkel, song “The Sound Of Silence”
Perhaps the answer or creative breakthrough you seek can only be found by listening to the silence.
“You have to become undeniably good at something. Nobody ever takes my advice, because it’s not the answer they wanted to hear…but I always say, ‘Be so good they can’t ignore you.’ If you are just always thinking, ‘How can I be really good?’—people will come to you.” -Steve Martin, memoir Born Standing Up
What sticks out to me the most from the above Steve Martin quote is “nobody ever takes my advice, because it’s not the answer they want to hear.”
If you ask and receive advice from someone who’s uber-successful in your desired field, why wouldn’t you take it? Or at least try it for a set period of time?
Which begs the question…Are you really seeking advice? Even if it’s a cold comfort.
Or are you just seeking affirmation of a prior belief and confirmation of what you’d like to hear?
If you encounter an issue or potential problem, first think about whether or not it will matter in 5 years.
If it won’t, don’t spend more than 5 minutes worrying about it.
If it will matter, and you’ve thought about it 5 or more times without taking any kind of action, stop worrying and do something. Take one teeny tiny step.
Remember, do nothing. Get nothing. (Other than more worrying).
Do something. You might get something. You will most assuredly learn something. And you’ll end your worrying.
Is today day one of you making your art? (In addition to art, insert any good intention or desired habit here like exercising, eating healthy, getting control of your finances, getting more sleep, signing up for that class, etc…)
Or is today just another day, in a long string of days, in which you tell yourself you’ll get around to it…one day.
“If the artist is happy with the work they’re creating and the viewer is enlivened by the work they’re experiencing, it doesn’t matter if they see it in the same way. In fact, it is impossible for anyone to experience your work as you do, or as anyone else does….The purpose of the work is to awaken something in you first, and then allow something to be awakened in others. And it’s fine if they’re not the same thing. We can only hope the magnitude of the charge we experience reverberates as powerfully for others as it does for us.” -Rick Rubin, The Creative Act
You can’t control how or if your art is received.
All you can do is answer the call ( or “the calling”) to make it.
But do make it. In whatever capacity you can. Because if you don’t answer the call, then rest assured my friend, it will haunt you forever.
“I had this cognition that I realized I was going into auditions, trying to get a job. And that simply wasn’t what I was supposed to be doing. An actor is supposed to create a compelling, interesting character, that serves the text. You present it in the environment where your audition happens. And then you walk away. And that’s it. Everything else is out of your control. Don’t even think about it. Don’t focus on that. You’re not going there to get a job. You are going there to present what you do. You act. And there it is. And walk away. And there’s power in that. And there’s confidence in that. And it’s also saying, I can only do so much. And then, the decision of who might get a job is so out of your control, that, really when you analyze it, it makes no sense to hold onto that. That, to me, was a breakthrough. And, once I adopted that philosophy, I never looked back. And I’ve never been busier in my life, than once I grabbed onto that. That’s it!” -Bryan Cranston
“This is something a teacher told me years ago, and he’s right: even if you’re auditioning for something that you know you’re never going to get or for something you read and didn’t like—if you get a chance to act in a room that somebody else has paid rent for, then you’re given a free chance to practice your craft. And in that moment, you should act as well as you can. Because when you act as well as you can, there’s no way the people who have watched you will forget it. At the end of the day, all that matters is the work. Everybody knows that. If I show up one day and the work I’m doing isn’t any good, then I’m just a guy who’s not acting well…So I would say it to anybody starting out: if you’re given a chance to act, take those words and bring them alive. If you do that, something good will transpire ultimately.” -Philip Seymour Hoffman
Whether it be 5 minutes in the audition room for a tv show you’re not crazy about and a part you’re not right for or the countless hours you spend rehearsing and then performing that dream role in the Shepard or Chekov play you love so much you produced it yourself, one thing you must do no matter what the circumstances…give it everything you got. Act as well as you can whenever and wherever you can.
If you got a chance to act today, realize it’s a gift. Be grateful for it and use that gift wisely. You never know when that gift will come back.
“Just remember, kid, you can quicker get back a million dollars that was stole than a word that you gave away.” -Eddie Carbone in A View From The Bridge
I recently saw a terrific production of Arthur Miller’s A View From The Bridge. (Thank you to my friend and wonderful actor Sal V. for inviting me. He and the rest of the ensemble were dynamite. Tix/info Here. I highly recommend it.)
Some friends and I were talking outside afterwards about the power of Miller’s play and why it still resonates. We all proposed our theories…my friend Alex focused on the brilliance and beauty of Miller’s language.
Alex is right. Miller writes beautiful, poetic language that as an actor you want to say, and as an audience member, you want to hear. It’s as good as it gets.
But, what I especially appreciated about this production is that the actors didn’t make a meal out of Miller’s language. They spoke it plainly and simply as everyday dialogue, just like their characters would. They didn’t stop down to “wax poetic.” They just spoke truthfully and honestly, yet full of intention.
As a result, Miller’s language was allowed to be heard and felt without interrupting the power and resonance of this timeless story.
So, a reminder to myself and my fellow actors…
Don’t make a meal out of the dialogue. Or as one director friend often says, “Don’t put any extra mustard on that hot dog. It doesn’t need it.”
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