We’d all loved to be recruited, courted, affirmed, wined and dined, told we’re amazing. Get a Godfather offer.
One, it validates us. Who we are and the work we’ve done.
Two, it lets us off the hook from having to choose or decide on a path. Instead, we get chosen.
You can sit around waiting all your life for that offer that’s never gonna come.
Or.
You can work hard to consistently create value, build community, learn new skills all the while, seeking and finding places that light you up inside.
And when you do find those special places, go to them and tell them why they’re amazing, show them all the incredible work you’ve done, ideate all the ways you can help them, and YOU make them an offer they can’t refuse.
“A man that hath friends must show himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.” (Proverbs 18:12 and the epigraph from Tarell Alvin McCraney’s powerhouse of a play, The Brothers Size)
“I’m always trying to make the intimate epic, meaning finding a way to grab my personal impulses or the personal impulses that I see in other human beings and activate them in a way that allows the theatrical engagement to be epic.” -Tarell Alvin McCraney
This past Wednesday night I saw a dynamite production of The Brothers Size at the Geffen Playhouse. We had a great turnout from our Vs. Theatre Club.
A friend and attendee said to me, “When I read the email Johnny, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to see the show. But then I clicked on the video you included where the playwright talks about how much the play means to him, and I got my ticket right away…I’m so glad I did.”
(The video he was referring to is this one. It’s with playwright and Geffen Artistic Director, Tarell Alvin McCraney. Give it a watch.)
If you want people to come see the art you’ve made, tell them why you made it. Why it matters to you. Get personal. Share as much as you can.
Because when you share your why, they (your intended audience) will now have their why. And when they do, they’ll show up.
P.S. – Go see The Brothers Size. It’s fantastic. The writing is masterful, the direction is spot on and the actors are sublime. For tix/info, click Here. Use discount code “Size20” for $20 tickets now through August 21.
My very first blog post was about the formula. One of the components was meaningful work (the other was meaningful community).
If you’re searching for meaningful work or wanting to create it for others (or both), here are some qualities to look out for:
(1) AGENCY. You get some say in the kind of work you do. And you have some decision-making autonomy.
(2) PROGRESS. You can see the fruits of your labor pay off.
(3) CONTRIBUTION. Your work makes things better for others.
(4) FUN. More often than not, you and others have fun. The work can still be hard and challenging (fun often stems from meeting these challenges) and have un-fun components, but on the whole, you really enjoy it.
(5) DEEP WORK/FLOW. You often find yourself fully engaged in what you’re doing. You reach a flow state.
(6) LEARNING. You’re constantly learning new skills. Growing. Getting better.
(7) PRIDE. You’re proud of your work, your organization and the contribution that you’re making. So much so, you enjoy talking about it with others.
Of course no job is perfect and not all of these categories will harmoniously line up, but the categories are worth thinking about. So…
Do you have this in your current job? If not, can you find it? Or find more of it? What are the opportunities to do so?
If you’re in any kind of leadership position, ask yourself how you can increase one or more of these categories for your team.
P.S. – If there are some other categories you think of, please let me know in the comments. Thanks!
The Chinese bamboo tree can grow to be nearly 100 feet tall—but it’s how it achieves that growth that makes it even more interesting.
After being planted in the ground, it requires daily watering and nurturing.
And then, nothing happens: Despite the effort, days, weeks, months, and even years go by with no signs of any growth.
Two years, three years, four years pass, with continued daily inputs and not so much as a break in the surface to show for it.
But suddenly, in the fifth year, everything changes:
The Chinese bamboo tree breaks through the surface, and in the span of just six weeks, grows up to 90-feet-tall.
The story of the Chinese bamboo tree’s growth offers a powerful lesson for life (from an unlikely source):
Your growth can be hard to see. It occurs silently, under the surface. You make the daily investments in yourself, but are completely unaware of their impact.
Growth often happens slowly, and then all at once.
The challenge is that if you don’t recognize your own growth in its most subtle, hidden forms, you may become discouraged on the journey, lose your motivation, and stop marching forward.
But rest assured, the growth is happening—you just need to look in the right places to find it.
Again, when you set out to achieve anything, it’s important to have metrics to consistently measure your progress. That way, even if no one else sees the bamboo, you won’t be discouraged. Because you know it’s there all along, growing, getting stronger.
And when it finally does emerge, that bamboo and you will soar to incredible heights.
“Progress equals happiness. Even if you’re not where you want to be yet. If you’re on the road, if you’re improving, if you’re making progress, you’re gonna love it. You’re gonna feel alive.” – Tony Robbins
“The first principle is that you must not fool yourself and you are the easiest person to fool.” -Richard P. Feynman
Once you decide to do something or embark on a passion project or even start a new habit, immediately find some ways to measure your progress. Have a few simple metrics that you can compare to a prior data point. I recommend weekly, but you can do it daily if you want.
This discipline of measurement allows you to honestly assess how you’re doing. And when you measure consistently, one of two things will happen:
One…You’ll see progress. Which feels awesome and will inspire you to keep going.
Or.
Two…You won’t see progress. (Or maybe you’ll start to plateau after making some initial progress.) That’s okay. Don’t despair. It just means it’s time to mix it up. Iterate. Try a different approach or tactic. Better that than fooling yourself into thinking you’re improving. When you’re actually not.
“In public avoid talking often and excessively about your accomplishments and dangers, for however much you enjoy recounting your dangers, it’s not so pleasant for others to hear about your affairs.” -Epictetus, Enchiridion
In life as much as you can, aim to listen to others. Rather than talk about yourself. Try to connect with them.
Save your storytelling for the stage.
And if your character is telling a story, no matter how great and riveting you think it is, it better have a strong intention. Otherwise it will fall flat and we’ll check out.
Can’t come up with an intention?…When in doubt, just go for connecting to the other person. That one will never let you down.
“The problem with smart people is they can come up with a good reason for not doing anything. They are smart enough to find the cracks, to foresee the challenges, and to talk themselves out of the idea. They are experts at justifying their lack of courage or lack of action with an intelligent excuse.
But there will always be reasons to not do something, and this is particularly true of anything worth doing. We value those moments in which we overcame challenge, not those in which we avoided it. Ultimately, action is a choice. The choice to emphasize the reasons for doing it despite the reasons you have for avoiding it.” -James Clear
Soon after you get really excited and lit up by an idea, you will inevitably find ways to talk yourself out of it.
Reality sets in. Obstacles surface. Naysayers reveal themselves. Life happens.
“I am your teacher and you are learning in my school. My aim is to bring you to completion, unhindered, free from compulsive behavior, unrestrained, without shame, free, flourishing, and happy…Your aim is to learn and diligently practice all these things. Why then don’t you complete the work, if you have the right aim and I have both the right aim and right preparation? What is missing? . . . The work is quite feasible, and is the only thing in our power. . . . Let go of the past. We must only begin. Believe me and you will see.” -Epictetus, Discourses
When you think this way, you are truly free. Free from ego. Free from judgment. Free from prior concepts. Free to do whatever it takes to make the work the absolute best it can be. So that it fully serves those you intend to serve.
That includes seeking out valuable and constructive criticism from those you trust. Because again, it’s not about you. It’s about the work.
“The tragedy of an attachment is that if its object is not attained it causes unhappiness. But if it is attained, it does not cause happiness – it merely causes a flash of pleasure followed by weariness, and it is always accompanied, of course, by the anxiety that you may lose the object of your attachment.” -Anthony de Mello
If the sun refused to shine I would still be loving you When mountains crumble to the sea There will still be you and me -song, “Thank You” by Led Zeppelin
A unifying theme across almost all the great spiritual traditions is the idea of detachment. Or not being attached “to the things of this world.” (John 2:15)
But detachment doesn’t come from going off into the woods and living like a hermit. Denying everything and everyone. (Although if that’s your jam, go for it.)
Detachment comes from being aware that nothing lasts. All fades away. Memento Mori.
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