X to Y

“Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.” -Lao Tzu

As much as possible, you want to avoid thinking and certainly saying, “I don’t want” statements. The reason? The more you express what you don’t want, the more you increase your chances of getting it. There’s even a name for this effect. It’s called the Ironic Process Theory and scientific studies validate it. This Sahil Bloom article goes into more detail.

So what to do about this effect?

Catch yourself in the act. Turn your X’s to Y’s.

The next time you feel yourself thinking “I don’t want X…”, turn it around. Instead think, “I want Y…”

For example, “I don’t want to be broke” turns to “I want to live a life where I am financially free and my money can make a real impact on the world.” Or, “I don’t want to work a job I hate” turns to “I want to engage in meaningful work that aligns with my passion.”

It’s a subtle shift, but it can be a game changer.

And like anything, it’s a habit, a practice, and thus, takes work. Don’t worry if you’re not perfect. Just be intentional.

At the very least, you’ll feel your mood and energy level improve. And that’s reason enough to try it, right?