The Vs. Studio Blog

“If we want to feel an undying passion for our work, if we want to feel we are contributing to something bigger than ourselves, we all need to know our WHY.” -from the book Find Your Why by Simon Sinek

“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.” -Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Before deciding to start a potential passion project, first ask “Why?”

“Why me?” “Why now?” “Why am I doing this?”

Make sure you’ve cemented a strong why for yourself and the project.

(Also ask “Who’s it for?” Make sure you’re clear on that. Even if your intended audience is just you.)

Only after you’ve answered “Why?” and have decided to make this project no matter what, then ask “How?”

“How can I achieve what’s in my head?” “How can I make this excellent?” “How can I stay the course?”

When the inevitable obstacles surface and they will, you need only concern yourself with “How?”

Not asking: “Why did this happen to me?” (That leads to inaction.)

But instead asking: “How can I use this obstacle to help make this project even better?” (Now you’re cooking with gas.)

In addition to recapping my end of year favorites (films, plays, books, albums, etc.) I thought for 2025, I’d share each month. Without further adieu and in no particular order, here are some February faves…

FILMS:

Aftersun directed by Charlotte Wells – two knockout, naturalistic performances; the director’s shooting style makes it feel super intimate; like we’re eavesdropping on something very private and real and personal.

Somebody Up There Likes Me directed by Robert Wise – early Paul Newman film that I wanted to see after it was mentioned in Ethan Hawke’s phenomenal documentary about Newman and Joanne Woodward, The Last Movie Star; Newman as Rocky Graziano is great, as is the rest of the ensemble.

Gattaca directed by Andrew Niccol – Late 90’s film that I somehow overlooked until recently (thank you Criterion Collection); dynamite film that delivers on all levels; I wrote this blog post about it.

PLAYS (Live, In Person):

Sam & Lizzie by Emily Kaczmarek – Our second Vs. Live at PRT reading this year; this fantastic two-hander calls for tour de force performances; an actor’s dream I would think, to play either of these parts.

Sonnets From Suburbia written and performed by Penny Peyser – A total passion project by my friend Penny (years in the doing); she’s toured it at various festivals including Fringe, written two books (with a third on the way) and made tons of Sonnet videos; so glad I got to catch it live; I loved it and laughed throughout; you can check out all her great work here.

The Seagull by Anton Chekhov – I’ve never seen this masterpiece (only read it) and was so glad my friend and great Chekhov scholar/teacher, Bruce Katzman, directed this production at the Odyssey Theatre; first rate production design (sound added so much) and some beautiful acting moments; Nina’s monologue towards the end where she says “I’m a seagull. No, no, that’s not it.” still haunts me.

ALBUMS:

Faye Webster – “Underdressed at the Symphony”

CocoRosie – “La Maison de Mon Reve”

The Dodos – “Beware of the Maniacs”

ARTICLES:

This great NYT article about Hank Azaria’s crazy good voice over skills.

Another great NYT article about George Clooney making his Broadway debut.

“Heres’ How I’m Preparing For The Next Four Years” by Ryan Holiday.

“I’m not writing as someone who has it all figured out. I’m writing as someone trying to figure it out, just like you. The truth is, life is one long experience of a million lessons. And nobody has it all figured out…We’re all constant works in progress at every level of success…And this is all okay. Because life isn’t about perfection. It’s about direction!…I’m not always writing about topics I’ve mastered — but ideals I’m working toward. Some days I get close, and other days I fall way short. And maybe that’s the most valuable thing I can share: not perfect examples, but honest ones. Because we’re all trying to build something better while being perfectly imperfect humans.” -Justin Welsh

“All writers are vain, selfish, and lazy, and at the very bottom of their motives there lies a mystery. Writing a book is a horrible, exhausting struggle, like a long bout of some painful illness. One would never undertake such a thing if one were not driven on by some demon whom one can neither resist nor understand. For all one knows that demon is simply the same instinct that makes a baby squall for attention. And yet it is also true that one can write nothing readable unless one constantly struggles to efface one’s own personality. Good prose is like a windowpane.” -George Orwell, Why I Write

“I write to give myself strength. I write to be the characters that I am not. I write to explore all the things I’m afraid of.” -Joss Whedon

“We cannot treat other people as if they’re final drafts while expecting people to look at us as if we’re rough drafts. Everybody’s a rough draft. We’re all writing ourselves in real time…All of our erasers are chewed up, we’re trying to figure it out, make ourselves and discover ourselves in real time. And that is an impossible thing to do. But that’s the thing that makes us human. -Lee Edward Colston

“I write because I don’t know what I think until I read what I say.” -Flannery O’Connor

No one has it all figured out.

But perhaps writing down your thoughts, hopes, dreams, etc…and having the courage to share those with others is a step in the right direction. For you and your reader.

We’re all a work in process. We’re all rough drafts. We’re all constantly messing up.

That’s okay.

Keep going. Keep dreaming. Keep learning. Keep writing. Keep sharing.

“One reason negative thoughts can feel so powerful is that they often contain a grain of truth. For example, the thought ‘I might fail’ is true – failure is always a possibility. The thought ‘I’m not good enough’ might have a bit of truth to it, in the sense that you (like everyone else) probably have room for growth and improvement. But just because a thought is true, or partly true, doesn’t mean it’s helpful to you.” -Joe Oliver and Kristy Potter

I came across this excellent Psyche article from the authors listed in the quote above: “Instead of wrestling with self-defeating thoughts, try this” and thought to share it.

It explains Relational Frame Theory and why certain thought patterns never work, yet also provides alternative strategies that can. Three from the article are as follows:

-Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)…Ask yourself if the thought you’re having is actually helpful to where you want to go or who you want to be (and do so without scolding yourself for having the though, which I think is key)

-Connect To The Present Moment…Notice your surroundings and connect to your breath. Repeat as often as necessary.

-Create Distance From Your Thoughts…Notice your thoughts and emotions. Then remind yourself that you are not your thoughts. Use humor to aid in doing so.

Give the article a read and also this prior post about Reframing.

Let me know what you think!

One of the greatest gifts you can give another person is your encouragement.

Check out the below letter from E.B. White (author of Charlotte’s Web) to a Mr. Nadeau (one of White’s readers perhaps?)…

Know anyone who can use a little encouragement today? Share the above letter with them. Or better yet, write your own.

It will mean the world to them.

P.S. – H/t to Susan Cain and her excellent newsletter, “The Quiet Life” for the E.B. White letter.

“When your mind says you’re exhausted, fried, totally tapped out, you’re really only 40 percent done. You still have 60 percent left in your tank.” -David Goggins from the book Living With A SEAL by Jesse Itzler

“You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” -Winnie The Pooh

“So that was the job I had to do when I started,” thought Sam: ‘to help Mr. Frodo to the last step and then die with him? Well, if that is the job then I must do it.” –The Return Of The King by J.R.R. Tolkien

Spoiler Alert: If you haven’t seen the film Gattaca, don’t read any further…(Phenomenal film by the way.)

There’s a scene towards the end where Vincent (played by Ethan Hawke) and his brother Anton (played by Loren Dean) are having an open-water swimming competition. It harkens back to their youth and is sort of a game of chicken.

Beaten by his brother again, Anton asks Vincent his secret to winning the competition. To which Vincent replies:

“I never saved anything for the swim back.”

For whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish, go all out. Give it everything you got. Don’t hold anything back. Because that’s the only way to do it.

And no matter the outcome, at least you know you tried. You really tried.

P.S. –The swimming scene described above.

“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.” -Harry S. Truman

“For there to be a gift, there must be no reciprocity, return, exchange, countergift, or debt…For there to be a gift, it is necessary that the donee not give back, amortize, reimburse…” -Jacques Derrida

“When you’ve done well and another has benefited by it, why like a fool do you look for a third thing on top—credit for the good deed or a favor in return?” -Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

To you who hear I say,
love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.
To the person who strikes you on one cheek,
offer the other one as well,
and from the person who takes your cloak,
do not withhold even your tunic.
Give to everyone who asks of you,
and from the one who takes what is yours do not demand it back.
Do to others as you would have them do to you.
For if you love those who love you,
what credit is that to you?
Even sinners love those who love them.
And if you do good to those who do good to you,
what credit is that to you?
Even sinners do the same.
If you lend money to those from whom you expect repayment,
what credit is that to you?
Even sinners lend to sinners,
and get back the same amount.
But rather, love your enemies and do good to them,
and lend expecting nothing back; -Luke 6: 27-35

The Master can keep giving
because there is no end to her wealth.
She acts without expectation,
succeeds without taking credit,
and doesn’t think that she is better
than anyone else. –Tao Te Ching by Lao-Tzu (Stephen Mitchell adaptation)

“The answer to the question ‘Why did you do the right thing? should always be ‘Because it was the right thing to do.’ After all, when you hear or see another person do that—especially when they might have endured some hardship or difficulty as a consequence for doing that right thing—do you not think, There, that is a human being at their finest? So why on earth do you need thanks or recognition for having done the right thing? It’s your job.” -Ryan Holiday

“Even
After
All this time
The Sun never says to the Earth,

“You owe me.”

Look
What happens
With a love like that,
It lights the whole sky.” -poem by Hafiz

No credit? No problem. Do it anyway.

For no other reason than you want to. That it’s the right thing to do. Do it out of pure love.

Transform. Not transact.

“But I tried, didn’t I? Goddamnit, at least I did that.” -novel, One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey

“Success is peace of mind that is the direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.” -John Wooden

“Fall down seven times, get up eight.” -Japanese Proverb

“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again.” -Samuel Beckett

Just.

Keep.

Trying.

That’s the whole enchilada right there folks.

P.S. – This scene.

A few questions to ask yourself before consuming that next article, news story or social media post (or really any form of consumption):

Why exactly am I consuming this right now?

Will this help me get to where I want to be? Or enable me to make the change I seek to make in the world?

How do I think this will make me feel?

Then proceed.

Consume wisely my friend.

“Ikigai represents the perfect harmony between what you are passionate about, what you are good at, what your world needs, and what you can be paid for…It is the intersection of these four elements that creates a sense of purpose and drives career success. -John Tarnoff

“Prototypes help you visualize alternatives in a very experiential way”. –Design Your Life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans

Per Wikipedia:

Ikigai (生き甲斐, lit. ’a reason for being’) is a Japanese concept referring to something that gives a person a sense of purpose, a reason for living.

The term compounds two Japanese words: iki (生き, meaning ‘life; alive’) and kai (甲斐, meaning ‘(an) effect; (a) result; (a) fruit; (a) worth; (a) use; (a) benefit; (no, little) avail’) (sequentially voiced as gai), to arrive at ‘a reason for living [being alive]; a meaning for [to] life; what [something that] makes life worth living; a ‘raison d’être’.

If you’re looking for a dream job or career, then it’s worth thinking about Ikigai and asking yourself the four questions in the diagram above (h/t to John Tarnoff for providing). It’s all about matchmaking. Journal about your answers. Research different fields. Talk to as many people who are actually doing the work you’re thinking about. Prototype different paths (in some cases, this might involve volunteering at various organizations). Know your world class strengths.

Keep drilling down until you get to the heart of the matter. The intersection of it all. That’s the point of maximum value and presumably, peak career happiness.

(By the way, you may find that after all this deep work, that the only way you can find your dream job is to create it yourself.)