“If you can’t hold yourself accountable, find someone who will.” -Paul Shirley
And if you don’t hold yourself accountable, then be prepared to be accountable to someone else.
“If you can’t hold yourself accountable, find someone who will.” -Paul Shirley
And if you don’t hold yourself accountable, then be prepared to be accountable to someone else.
“In truth, the work itself is the adventure. And no artist could go about this work, or would want to, with less than extraordinary energy and concentration. The extraordinary is what art is about.” -Mary Oliver
The below passage from Mary Oliver’s book of essays Upstream is phenomenal (H/t to to Poetic Outlaws)
In creative work—creative work of all kinds—those who are the world’s working artists are not trying to help the world go around, but forward. Which is something altogether different from the ordinary.
Such work does not refute the ordinary. It is, simply, something else. Its labor requires a different outlook—a different set of priorities.
Certainly there is within each of us a self that is neither a child, nor a servant of the hours. It is a third self, occasional in some of us, tyrant in others. This self is out of love with the ordinary; it is out of love with time. It has a hunger for eternity.
Intellectual work sometimes, spiritual work certainly, artistic work always—these are forces that fall within its grasp, forces that must travel beyond the realm of the hour and the restraint of the habit. Nor can the actual work be well separated from the entire life.
Like the knights of the Middle Ages, there is little the creatively inclined person can do but to prepare himself, body and spirit, for the labor to come—for his adventures are all unknown.
In truth, the work itself is the adventure. And no artist could go about this work, or would want to, with less than extraordinary energy and concentration. The extraordinary is what art is about.
Neither is it possible to control, or regulate, the machinery of creativity. One must work with the creative powers—for not to work with is to work against; in art as in spiritual life there is no neutral place.
Its concern is the edge, and the making of a form out of the formlessness that is beyond the edge. Of this there can be no question—creative work requires a loyalty as complete as the loyalty of water to the force of gravity.
A person trudging through the wilderness of creation who does not know this—who does not swallow this—is lost.
He who does not crave that roofless place eternity should stay at home.
Such a person is perfectly worthy, and useful, and even beautiful, but is not an artist. Such a person had better live with timely ambitions and finished work formed for the sparkle of the moment only.
There is a notion that creative people are absentminded, reckless, heedless of social customs and obligations. It is, hopefully, true. For they are in another world altogether. It is a world where the third self is governor. Neither is the purity of art the innocence of childhood, if there is such a thing.
One’s life as a child, with all its emotional rages and ranges, is but grass for the winged horse—it must be chewed well in those savage teeth.
There are irreconcilable differences between acknowledging and examining the fabulations of one’s past and dressing them up as though they were adult figures, fit for art, which they never will be.
The working, concentrating artist is an adult who refuses interruption from himself, who remains absorbed and energized in and by the work—who is thus responsible to the work.
There is no other way work of artistic worth can be done. And the occasional success, to the striver, is worth everything.
The most regretful people on earth are those who felt the call to creative work, who felt their own creative power restive and uprising, and gave to it neither power nor time.
If you feel the call, then you must heed the call.
Go make your art.
“Earlier this week I read a line that stood out to me, “Your goal in life should be to reduce the amount of time it takes you to get out of a bad state.”
The ability to bounce back quickly is a key skill in life.
My wife once told me, “When you’re five, you can be mad for a day. When you’re ten, you can be mad for an hour. By the time you’re thirty, you get ten minutes—and then you have to move on.”
Life is full of moments of frustration and disappointment. Growth and maturity is learning to pull yourself out of a bad state faster.” -James Clear
To fix what’s bugging you, chances are you don’t need to do something big like move to a different state.
You just need a state change.
Go for a run, meditate, pray, take a nap, get some ice cream, do some push ups, recite your favorite mantra, read some poetry, take a cold shower, call a friend, do a random act of kindness, etc…Whatever. Just do something, anything, that shifts your focus. That gets you out of that negative state of mind and back on track, doing what you want to be doing.
Age and experience bring the tools to accomplish this state change. As well as the knowledge that you can make the change much faster than you think.
And so today, my world it smiles
Your hand in mine, we walk the miles
Thanks to you it will be done
For you to me are the only one, yeah
Alright now
Happiness, no more be sad
Happiness, I’m glad
If the sun refused to shine
I would still be loving you
If mountains crumble to the sea
There will still be you and me -song “Thank You” by Led Zeppelin
Wanna be more present? Say “Thank You.”
Wanna be in a better mood? Say “Thank You.”
And while you’re at it, listen to this Chris Cornell cover.
Teaching and acting share this best practice in common…Asking yourself before you start, “What is my objective?”
A teacher objective might be, “What do I want the student to learn?”
An actor objective might be, “What do I want the other person to get or now understand?”
The test to see if your objective works lies solely in what the student or other person does as a result of your actions.
And while you still might accomplish your goal without knowing or having an objective, it certainly makes things a whole lot easier and clearer if you do.
“Try to be surprised by something every day. It could be something you see, hear, or read about. Stop to look at the unusual car parked at the curb, taste the new item on the cafeteria menu, actually listen to your colleague at the office. How is this different from other similar cars, dishes or conversations? What is its essence? Don’t assume that you already know what these things are all about, or that even if you knew them, they wouldn’t matter anyway. Experience this one thing for what it is, not what you think it is. Be open to what the world is telling you. Life is nothing more than a stream of experiences — the more widely and deeply you swim in it, the richer your life will be.” -psychologist and author, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
When’s the last time life surprised you? If it’s been a while, then you need to actively notice more.
When’s the last time you surprised yourself? If it’s been a while, then you need to actively risk more.
“The mind mistakes the talking for the doing…Once you’ve told people of your intentions, it gives you a “premature sense of completeness.” -Derek Sivers
Whenever you’re tempted to talk about what you’re gonna do, don’t.
Instead, get to work and do it.
Talking about it with others sure is fun. And you’ll get almost all the same endorphins you would from completing it. Talk is tricky that way.
But years later, you’ll still be talking about it.
Wishing and wondering why you never did it.
P.S. – This short excerpt from Derek Sivers TED Talk says it all.

“It’s just a matter of mastering the mundane—of repeating simple little disciplines that, done consistently over time, will add up to the very biggest accomplishments.” -Jeff Olson, book The Slight Edge
“The reality for those in the successful inner circle is simply “the mundanity of excellence”: a smoothly applied routine of using finely tuned resources with the confidence that one knows how to make them pay off. To those in the outer tiers, even those in the second competitive rank, there seems to be some mysterious quality that the successful possess, and this sense of difference generates a barrier of anxiety which makes it all the more impassable.” Randall Collins, The Sociology of Philosophies
“The common denominator of success—the secret of success of everyone who has ever been successful—lies in the fact that they formed the habit of doing things that failures don’t like to do. What are the things that failures don’t like to do?…The very things that you and I and other human beings, including successful men and women, naturally don’t like to do…Maybe you’ve wondered why those who are exceptional at what they do seem to like to do things most people don’t like to do….They don’t!,,,Then why do they do them?…Because by doing the things they don’t like to do, they can accomplish the things they want to accomplish.” -Albert Gray
“I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.’ -Muhammad Ali
Stop desiring to only do what you like to do.
Start desiring to find a way to do what you don’t like to do, but know you have to do, in service of what you love to do.
Master yourself by mastering the mundane.
That’s how you’ll build a championship life.

“Pain + Reflection = Progress.” -Ray Dalio
Pain without reflection is just…Pain.
And because you didn’t take time to reflect and figure out what to do better next time, how you can grow, you will just end up doing the same thing again.
Which will bring on more…Pain.
“The most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved.” -Mother Teresa
“When so many are lonely as seem to be lonely, it would be inexcusably selfish to be lonely alone.” — Tennessee Williams.
Right now, we’ve got a whole lotta loneliness going on. Especially here in the United States where the surgeon general called it an epidemic.
Every single time you possibly can, make eye contact with someone, smile and say hello.
Worst case scenario…they ignore you and move on by. So what?
Best case scenario…your greeting might be the only one they’ve received in a very, very long time. And it might change the entire trajectory of their life.
Do it. Don’t wait. Make the first move. Smile every time. You’ll be glad you did. So will they.
P.S. – Listen to Hank and Elvis sing about being lonely.