Fair Expectations?

“Expectation is the root of all heartache.” -Shakespeare

“We listen with expectation, insight and point of view.” – Howard Fine

“Our actions are the result of immediate needs and expectations…In rehearsals we must discover and test the actions that are needed from moment to moment in conjunction with what we expect from them…My passion for acting returned, never to desert me again, once I had understood how to suspend knowledge of what was to come by unearthing the character’s expectations.” -Uta Hagen, book A Challenge For The Actor

Expectations are awesome for your acting. For when inevitably the other characters fail to live up to them, it creates conflict, which then leads to great drama. You can’t have too many of them. Expect away!

But be cautious with your expectations of others in real life. Have as little as possible.

And the next time you find yourself upset because someone failed to live up to one or more of your expectations, ask yourself two questions:

One…Are your expectations of that person fair? If the roles were reversed, could you live up to these?

Two…Have you clearly communicated your expectations to that person?

If the answer to either or both of these questions is no, it might be best to drop said expectations. Or at least go back to the drawing board and further refine and communicate them.

It will save you and the other person a whole lot of unnecessary grief, heartache and pain.